OutSyed The Box

OutSyed The Box

FMT's Kedai Kopi Journalism : Anonymous, Shadowy Cabinet

Posted: 25 Jun 2012 03:08 AM PDT

Todate the Pakatan Rakyat has not been able to name any kind of shadow Cabinet at all. They do not even have a candidate for Prime Minister. Hadi Awang cannot be Prime Minister if he does not stand for re-election as a Member of Parliament.

Anyway the pro Pakatan website Free Malaysia Today has decided to help the Pakatan by naming a shadow cabinet for Pakatan.  They claim to have spoken to a Pakatan MP at a kedai kopi and they came up with an editorial like opinion about the Pakatan shadow cabinet.

Their article says :

This columnist has talked to a Pakatan MP who has furnished some of the names for a few of the major ministries and the rest are based on her observation. 

Be that as it may, this columnist has talked to a Pakatan MP who wished to remain anonymous who has furnished some of the names for a few of the major ministries while some are names culled through observations from the performances of these lawmakers 

(Its from an Anonymous Pakatan MP.  Is there such an animal? It is coffee shop talk. Talk about credibility).

While this list attempts to show a fair representation, inevitably there will be ministries wherein the representation of certain parties will be more than others.

(Err...you mean one party will dominate the show. Thats ok. Sap sap sui. Malaysia Boleh maa).

Appended below is the all-important list:

Prime Minister: Anwar Ibrahim (PKR, Permatang Pauh MP)


(A Tamil Muslim Prime Minister. Satu Malaysia. OK) 

1. Deputy Prime Ministers:

a. Lim Kit Siang (DAP, Ipoh Timur MP)
b. Abdul Hadi Awang (PAS, Marang MP)
c. One seat for either a Sabahan or a Sarawakian who will be looking after East Malaysian affairs. (There are names of candidates but this columnist was instructed not to reveal it.)

(Hmm...this is getting to be a little annoy-nymous. "Anonymous MP keeps East Malaysian DPM anonymous" Sounds like Rupert Murdoch's "Headless body found in topless bar'.  Free Malaysia Today's kedai kopi journalism. The DPM from East Malaysia maybe be Chinese.) 

2. Finance Ministry:

a. Tony Pua (DAP, Petaling Jaya Utara MP)
b. Rafizi Ramli (PKR, currently not a MP, will contest in the coming polls)
c. Nizar Jamaluddin (PAS, Bukit Gantang MP)

(Huh..three Finance Ministers? What type of shadowy cabinet is this? Very shadowy lah. Tony Pua Finance Minister? Rafizi Ramli also Finance Minister? Nizar Jamaluddin also Finance Minister? Are you insane? Nizar Jamaludin? Rafizi Ramli? Tony Pua's Singapore listed company went bust. In Malay it is called bankrap.  Just recently Apanam's Blog wrote that :



Tony Pua was ashamed to publish the name ..of Cyber Village Holding Ltd. He didn't state that he was running a loss making company. . . Cyber Village was quickly changed name in 2008 to Koyo International to mislead Malaysian and , of course, to avoid detection. . .  Pua did not state that Cyber village was taken over by Brightsphere Sdn Bhd (co No: 804460).  . . 
In 2004 Pua and his Cyber Village were in the shit hole and needed financial help. Who came to his assitance?? Just*n Le*ng M*ng L**ng, the grandson of the late Tan Sri L*m G*h T*ng of G*n**ng. "

So bila company sudah bankrap boleh jadi Finance Minister ke? Wah...Singapore got talent.  Anyway FMT was getting bored so they put in another joke. Here it is :

3. Education Ministry:


a. Dzulkefly Ahmad (PAS, Kuala Selangor MP)
b. S Kulasegaran (DAP, Ipoh Barat MP)
c. Chong Eng (DAP, Bukit Mertajam MP)


(Huh!! Three Education Ministers? Wah..just now three Finance Ministers, now three Education Ministers? Or maybe one Minister and two Deputies? Zul Ahmad Education Minister? Kulasegaran? Cikgu, cikgu..boleh tak kita pukul lembu? Boleh tapi di buntot dia sahaja...err dengan menggunakan kayu saiz sederhana, kita tidak boleh hayun kayu lebih tinggi dari bahu. Mesti di dahului dengan puji-pujian kepada kepala lembu - yang masih hidup.)  

4. Home Ministry:

a. Azmin Ali (PKR, Gombak MP)
b. Mahfuz Omar (PAS, Pokok Sena MP)
c. M Manogaran (DAP, Teluk Intan MP)
(Knowledge and expertise can also be gained by consulting PAS member Fauzi Shaari, retired from CID, Bukit Aman.)


(I feel pity for the writer - actually she is just a Malaysian looking for a happy life in this country. Happiness in this country lies in not looking down upon your multi racial neighbour and not trying to take advantage of your multi racial neighbour's weakness for your own benefit. You have to understand that. If you dont, then you end up writing silly things like this. So are there going to be three Home Ministers as well? And a CID Bukit Aman fellow can be trusted just because he  joined PAS? What about that disgraced Airforce general who was stripped of his rank?)  



5. Defence Ministry:

a. Dr Hatta Ramli (PAS, Kuala Krai MP)
b. Liew Chin Tong (DAP, Bukit Bendera MP)
c. Tian Chua (PKR, Batu MP)
(Knowledge and technical know-how can be gained from PAS member First Admiral (retired) Mohamad Imran Abd Hamid.)


(Three Defence Ministers as well? One Malay and two Chinese? Tian Chua the street urchin? Hatta Ramli defence minister? Perang Badr itu zaman dulu bang. Tak boleh naik unta lagi tau.)

6. Law Ministry:

a. Karpal Singh (DAP, Bukit Gelugor MP)
b. Gobind Singh (DAP, Puchong MP)
c. William Leong (PKR, Selayang MP)
d. R Sivarasa (PKR, Subang MP)
e. Hanipa Maidin (PAS, non-MP who acts for PAS on many legal matters)


(Five Law Ministers?  Two Singh from DAP, PKR one Chinese one Tamil. PAS also one Tamil. Again no Melayu, no Sabahan and no Sarawakian)

7. Health Ministry:

a. Dr Lee Boon Chye (PKR, Gopeng MP)
b. Dr Tan Seng Giaw (DAP, Kepong MP)
c. Dr Siti Mariah Mahmood (PAS, Kota Raja MP)
d. Dr Michael Jeyakumar (PSM, Sg. Siput MP)


(Four Health Ministers? Two Chinese, one Indian and one Malay).

8. Transport Ministry:
a. Khalid Samad (PAS, Shah Alam MP)
b. Tan Kok Wai (DAP, Cheras MP)
c. Baru Bian (state assemblyman for Ba'Kelalan)
Baru Bian can look into improving transport into the interiors of Sarawak.


(At last..the only East Malaysian in the Cabinet. Baru Bian is from Sarawak. There are NO OTHER native Sabahan or Sarawakian Ministers. The non-existent anonymous DPM from East Malaysia could be Chinese).

9. International Trade and Industry Ministry:

a. Khalid Ibrahim (PKR, state Assemblyman for Ijok, Selangor Menteri Besar)
b. Teresa Kok (DAP, Seputeh MP)
c. Husam Musa (PAS, state assemblyman for Salor)


(Husam? Umar Vadillo please take note. Jamnapari kambing also take note. Three MITI Ministers?)

10. Agriculture Ministry:
a. Salahuddin Ayub (PAS, Kubang Kerian MP but this time will be leaving Kelantan to contest in Johor)
b. Ng Suee Lim (DAP, state assemblyman for Sekinchan, he champions the padi farmers)
(For Felda matters, Mazlan Aliman of PAS is at the forefront in fighting for the rights of the settlers and highlighting Felda issues.)


(Only two Ministers of Agriculture? Defense has FIVE Ministers? MITI has three Ministers?)

11. Foreign Ministry:
a. Kamarudin Jaffar (PAS, Tumpat MP)
b. Lim Guan Eng (DAP, state assemblyman for Ayer Puteh, Penang Chief Minister)
c. Elizabeth Wong (PKR, state assemblyman for Bukit Lanjan)


(Elizabeth Wong ! !  Minister of Inter Racial Mingling and Tingling ? Cool.)

12. Federal Territories and Urban Wellbeing Ministry:

a. Lim Lip Eng (DAP, Segambut MP)
b. Nurul Izzah Anwar (PKR, Lembah Pantai MP)


(Only two Ministers for FT?)

13. Environment Ministry:
a. Fuziah Salleh (PKR, Kuantan MP)
b. Che Rosli Che Mat (PAS, Hulu Langat MP)
c. Nga Kor Ming (DAP, Taiping MP)


(Nga for environment? Fuziah Salleh for hill cutting in Penang?)

14. Women Ministry:
a. Zuraida Kamaruddin (PKR, Ampang MP)
b. Fong Po Kuan (DAP, Batu Gajah MP)
c. Siti Zailah Mohd Yusof (PAS, Rantau Panjang MP)


(Kes tutup aurat, buka aurat, tutup aurat. Pilih tutup atau buka. Saya pilih 'atau'.)

15. Race Relations and Inter-Faith Dialogue Ministry:


a. Nik Aziz Nik Mat (PAS, state assemblyman for Chempaka, Kelantan menteri besar)
b. Mujahid Yusof Rawa (PAS, Parit Buntar MP)
c. Mohd Nur Manuty, (PKR, at the moment not an MP)
d. Ngeh Koo Ham (DAP, Beruas MP)
e. V Sivakumar (DAP, state assemblyman for Tronoh)


The Ministry for Race Relations and Inter-Faith Dialogue will be a place for discussions on thorny issues so that solutions can be sought without acrimony.


(Race relations and interfaith? I say this one Elizabeth Wong should do a better job lah.  Five Ministers for race relations? Or is it one Minister and four deputies?)


Well these are obviously ramblings of a young child.  The genuine concern is showing, these young people really want to do good. So did Teoh Beng Hock. But he went flying out the window when his idealistic dreams were just shattered by what he saw.  It was very sad.


There is NO allocation for any Minister from Sabah. Not even one. And there is only one Dayak Baru Bian from Sarawak. And they call this an inclusive all Malaysian Cabinet?  They must be kidding.


The present BN Government has six full Ministers with really cool names like Jala, Embas, Ongkili and Dompok.  There are five Deputy Ministers with even cooler names like Ukin, Dungau, Entulu, Salang Gandum and Jelaing Mersaet. Really, really super cool names - one with Nature, one with the soil, trees and rivers.  100% Bumiputera betul.  1 Malaysia.  


The Pakatan also does not seem to have anything new. Other than a silly Ministry of Interfaith Dialogue (the first of its kind in the world, showing how backward is our thinking really) the Pakatan seeks to copy cat all the Ministries set up by the BN.


Women's Affairs, Ministry of FT etc are all modeled on the BN. I thought if the Pakatan wins they are going to have elections for mayors and town councils. So why do they still need a Minister of FT?


Think OutSyed the Box lah. 


How about merging MITI, Domestic Trade, Bank Negara, Customs, Immigration, Lembaga Hasil Dalam Negeri and Budget all under one super Ministry of Economic Affairs? With say seven KSU's reporting to one really qualified Minister and maybe a few Deputies? 


Then MOF can be reduced to just making sure the Gomen has enough funds to sign its cheques.  


Or here is another suggestion. With only 30 million people we have more Cabinet Ministers than India which has 1 billion people.  Why not reduce the Cabinet to just twelve Ministries.  


The Cabinet NEED NOT have any ministers. There can be just a Prime Minister, a Deputy Prime Minister and SIX Cabinet Deputies.   Each Cabinet Deputy can be responsible for two Ministries each and they will report to the PM.  


If the ministries do not have Ministers, then the Civil Servants will have to run them.  Keep everything lean and transparent, keep the Little Napoleons down (by precisely defining work functions and deliverables).   With less heads to mess with (or to mess things up) the Gomen can make decisions quicker and move even faster. 


So I hope the Pakatan can be a little bit more creative than just duplicate the Ministry of Women's Affairs, Ministry of Flying Kites Affairs and such.


And please do not leave out the Sabahans and Sarawakians.

Egypt : Club Of Doom Part 2

Posted: 24 Jun 2012 08:53 PM PDT


Here is a quick take on Egypt. Folks, tak payah fikir panjang.  If you want you can read the entire news report but it is a waste of time.  This is Club of Doom Part 2.

  • Islamist Mohammed Morsi winner in Egypt's first free presidential election in history..
  • Morsi narrowly defeated Shafiq with 51.7 percent of the vote versus 48, by a margin of only 800,000 votes. Turnout was 51 percent.
  • Morsi said on his official web page. "I will not betray God .."

  • still-dominant military rulers who recently stripped the presidency of most of its powers.
  • other power center is the ruling military council that .. is headed by Mubarak's defense minister of 20 years.
  • a court dissolved the freely elected parliament, which is dominated by the Muslim Brotherhood, leaving the military now in charge of legislating.

  • bargaining chip between the generals and the Brotherhood ..power-sharing agreement. 
  • The country's new constitution is not written and the authorities of the president are not clear.


one week ago, the Supreme Council of the Armed Forces (SCAF) 
  • issued constitutional amendments that stripped the president's office of major powers
  • generals made themselves the final arbiters  
  • writing the constitution, legislating, passing the state budget
  • granted military police broad powers to detain civilians.


Well, the Brotherhood fellow has slipped in with just 51% of the vote. But note this - voter turnout was only 51%. Meaning only 25% of voters actually voted for Morsi the Brotherhood guy.  He does NOT have the support of the majority Egyptian voters. Only one out of four people who voted support him. 

The military understands this quite well. Morsi understands this well too. That is why the presidents power has been stripped, the generals are final arbiters, the constitution has not been written, the military will watch over security matters.  Not much change in Egypt folks. They will still be poor.

Morsi says,  "I will not betray God ..".  This is another way of saying "I am God..".  Here is the logic. God does not speak to anyone. So there is no way of Morsi knowing directly from God if he is betraying God or not.  So at the end of the day, it is Morsi who will decide if God likes him or not. Morsi will start speaking on behalf of God.  He will soon start handing out the "keys to paradise" - like ayatollah Khomeini or Nik Aziz.  This is bound to happen - lets give Morsi say two years?

Here is something even more shocking :  "a court dissolved the freely elected parliament, which is dominated by the Muslim Brotherhood, leaving the military now in charge of legislating."

The generals have checkmated the elected Parliament. They got the court to dissolve Parliament. This is ridiculous. This is why we must always make Parliament supreme. Electoral Courts can decide cases involving individual Parliamentary seats but not dissolving the entire Parliament. If there are serious problems just re-do the general elections again. 

The Muslim Brotherhood is going to feel really shortchanged. Not only have they lost the Parliament to the generals but their presidential winner will also be under the power of the generals.

In their Parliamentary elections last year, with its many rounds of voting, the highest turnout was 65% (in some round).  Now, only 51% of voters came out to vote in their presidential elections. This means almost half of Egyptian voters do not have faith in the new system. And Morsi only secured 51% of 51% = 26% of the voters.  

Before democracy can succeed, the people must have a certain minimum level of civilisation and inteligence. There must be respect for the written Law as well as respect for written agreements. In the Club of Doom countries, the general populace still has not learned to respect the Law or respect written agreements. Hence there is chaos.

If you want to cause chaos, just disregard the Law and written agreements. Just disregard civilised conduct.   This is what the  Bapak Rasuah Malaysia, Pencipta Politik Wang and Tokoh Liwat Negara is trying his best to do here.  

Or you can become God. You can say, "God told me that I should not accept this.." Or "I cannot betray God's laws.."  That always works with the less intelligent.

Aggressive Turkeys

Posted: 24 Jun 2012 07:27 AM PDT

  • Syria said Saturday it shot down a Turkish reconnaissance plane because the plane entered its airspace
  • Turkish President Abdullah Gul conceded the plane may have unintentionally crossed into Syrian airspace
  • The plane, an unarmed F-4, went down in the Mediterranean Sea about eight miles (13 kilometers) from the Syrian town of Latakia, Turkey said. 


  • Syria claimed the jet violated its air space over territorial waters, penetrating about 1 kilometer (0.62 mile). 
  • Turkey threatened to retaliate but did not say what action it would take 
  • Turkey has become one of the strongest critics of Syria's regime. 
  • Turkey hosts civilian and military Syrian opposition groups, including hundreds of army defectors 
  • Turkish authorities also suspect Damascus . . is now turning a blind eye to Syria-based Kurdish fighters 
  • Turkey has joined the United States and other nations in saying that Syrian President Bashar Assad should step down 
Inspite of  what is going on in Syria, I dont see why the Turks want to pour more oil into the fire. As if the Syrians do not have enough problems already?

The report is ambiguous - it says eight miles from the Syrian town of Latakia. Latakia is a port. Eight miles from the Post Office or from the shore line?  Armed or unarmed, an F4 Phantom jet (no matter how old it was) travelling at the speed of sound right off the coastline would make any country nervous. Plus the Syrians have anti aircraft missiles which obviously react quickly, like any other modern air defence system. As if the Turks did not know all that?



The statement  "Turkish authorities also suspect Damascus . . is now turning a blind eye to Syria-based Kurdish fighters"  sounds hypocritical when the previous line says   "Turkey hosts civilian and military Syrian opposition groups, including hundreds of army defectors.."

So it is OK for the Turks to host Syrian opposition groups but it is not OK for Syria to host Turkish opposition groups? This is why the Middle East is so screwed up. They are childish.

There is a reason why I am highlighting this. Over the past few years (since the pro religion Erdogan guy became the president) the Turks seem to be getting a tad bit aggressive in many things.  

The Turks had dreams of being accepted as Europeans but todate they have not been admitted into the European Union. The Europeans do not see the Turks as European in culture.  There are also political issues like the Turks refusing to acknowledge the Armenian Genocide of 1915. 

So the Turks are now looking at the Islamic world again.  I have listened to more than one Turkish speaker at seminars and conferences here in Kuala Lumpur who sound slightly pontificating about how things should be done. 

There was one Turkish guy who said that there is a complete reference to Syariah Law in the Majele (Majalah) which was an official Turkish law journal of sorts during the time of the Ottoman Caliphate. The Ottoman Caliphs were eventually put into the dustbin of history  because of their corruption, ineptitude and moral decay. Maybe they read too much into the Majele. 

Another guy spoke about something called the Gulan Movement in Turkey. This is a faith based movement that seeks to introduce 'moderate' religious teaching in their system.  They were trying to promote their movement here as well (in fact they already have their people here). Oh well.  Religion is like being pregnant ok. Once you are pregnant, you are pregnant. There is no such thing as being half pregnant or 10% pregnant. We will just have to wait and see what comes out after nine months - whether human or monkey.  

I think the Turks feel that they should rise again to lead the Islamic world. Maybe they want to re-establish their Caliphate - which eventually failed quite miserably.  Maybe they will arm the F4 Phantoms.  How I wish the EU had accepted them. They would have been saved. 

Indon Protes Peta Malaysia

Posted: 24 Jun 2012 03:28 AM PDT


Some Indonesians want to protest Malaysia's location on the globe. They say Malaysia should not be located North of Java or Jakarta.  They also dont like the bluish green colour  given to Malaysia on this particular map.  It implies Malaysia is greener and cleaner than Indonesia. They resent that. 

They also dont like that Indonesia is coloured a dirty brown in this particular map. It implies brown toilet stains.  As a result of which they are prepared to step on the Malaysian flag and burn down the Malaysian Embassy.





Here is a picture of Adi Mardiyati, an Indonesian protester preparing to fight with Malaysia. This guy is a member of Bendera.  What the picture does not show is a large suitcase which Adi carries with him. It has his supply of Panadol.






In the next picture here (courtesy of Zamkata Blog) are Indonesians protesting in Jakarta against the Tor Tor dance   Some of them are future construction labourers in Malaysia, some are future housemaids while the rest may be just  PATI (Pendatang Tanpa Izin). 






Indonesia is a great country. Why? Because thats where Indons live. 
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